Here Are 16 Pearls of Wisdom I Learnt from 16 Years of My Life
I try to notice how time flies, so that it realises my eyes and slows for a bit
October is my favourite month.
The leaves fall, the weather wavers, the night lengthens. It is the time of festivals.
Also, due to some unexpected miracle by the omnipresent force running the universe, I took birth in this blessed time.
Completing sixteen earth years is glorified.
Every birthday, I expect to feel different. Bigger, better, stronger. Yet, I feel the same as ever. That is because I realise that your birthday is simply a reflection and a summation of all the years lived and experiences experienced.
Life has been just like … life.
I know, shocking. I have had ups and downs like everyone else. Days I have felt like living in heaven; times when I have been dumped down in hell.
This is a small list of all the stuff I have learned for both you and my future self to introspect on.
Dear future-and-past-self,
Do good, stay kind, keep hope, even when nobody’s looking
Most of humanity doesn’t have faith in its own kind. Every good act doesn’t get rewarded and every bad act doesn’t get punished.
This should not stop you from trying to do good always.
(There’s a difference between good and nice, mind you.)
Sure, don’t get exploited in this slightly cruel world. Yet, don’t pass an opportunity to add a little more kindness and warmth around, because, even if nobody is watching, you are.
You don’t need to overthink every damn thing. Just let it be
Sometimes, the problem may seem too damning, a circumstance too complex. I often get stuck as I analyse and overanalyse every thing that comes my way.
Here's to every extra-vigilant soul out there:
Let it be. It won’t be as bad. It will pass. Write it down, expel it out of your system, and don’t let it hijack your day.
The importance of friends cannot ever be overrated
Human-beings are social creatures. Introvert or extrovert, you need a close-knit group to talk with.
Why do you think our ancestors began the practice of celebrating different days as festivals when you get to meet several of your friends and family members?
It is because they knew how vital these days would be in illuminating every human’s life.
I am ever grateful for my friends. We have been there for each other in the darkest of times; we have shared the best of experiences together.
To have good friends, be a great one first and act on your generous impulses.
Solitude, relaxation, and “me-time” are important as well
Every minute of your day doesn’t have to go towards your future. You are not wasting your time if you aren’t doing something productive.
Time is a gift.
Enjoying your day and focusing on the present is as important.
Recognise the importance of “me-time” — a time you devote to your mental well-being. Write a journal, sing off-key, draw an unrecognizable flower, and relax. You require your own space as well.
If you don’t choose a day as such on your own, your body will.
You WILL make mistakes and mess up. Failure is a part of life
One of my nightmares was similar to Hermione’s — getting low marks. And it happened. Nothing could be done to amend it except to prepare better for the future.
Life is crests and troughs. There will be a day when it will be a complete wreck.
Richard Muller says: Don’t be afraid to mess up. Don’t mess up on purpose, but don’t let fear of making mistakes intimidate you.
A key personality trait you can develop is resilience. You can only learn it by practice, and you will have lots of practice, because indeed you will mess up.
Just don’t let it get to you. Bounce back.
Always consider the situation from the other lens. Practice empathy
All the book readers already know to never consider a situation from only one (yours) lens. Even if you are on the other side, you can understand the antagonist, and probably even sympathise.
There can be situations when nobody’s the bad guy, where it is none's fault. Two people can be on opposing ends merely due to circumstance.
Empathise.
Nobody is your friend or enemy for life
Don’t be keen on villainising people around you.
Most relationships have an expiry date and are fluid in nature. Enjoy people like you enjoy sunsets. They are transient, but they are pretty while they last.
The best way to make a person like you is by calling on a small favour and remembering your manners, saying a thank you.
Humour is vital for your life
Laughter is the best cure, even when the joke is on you. Try to laugh and make others laugh till their tummies ache and their eyes water. It is one of the world’s best feels.
Tread lightly, dear
I failed the worst when I tried too hard. Now, I tread softly in the extremes.
This quote has stuck with me ever since I stumbled upon it.
It’s dark because you are trying too hard.
Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly.
Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply.
Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them…
Lightly, lightly – it’s the best advice ever given me.― Aldous Huxley
Health > Studies > Fun
Contrary to the typical Asian student, I am often scolded for studying. Then, I wondered why my parents couldn’t understand that if I didn't practice, I would flop as a student.
Now I realise that I wasn’t paying attention to my health (mental and physical).
Topics can be repeated, but recovering from illnesses isn't easy.
Similarly, fun times are important, but we should not forget the importance of studies either.
Embrace being different and mad
To “fit in” is the norm,
To be yourself is the storm!
I often couldn’t fit in. And honestly, it was great not to care and be unapologetically yourself!
Yes, I want to pull in philosophy whenever I get an excuse, flip open novels anywhere, and grin madly at the silliest of things. No, I won’t hide my interests just for the sake of pleasing society.
A smile is the best thing you can wear
Let beauty standards rot in hell. You don’t need a pound of makeup, waxed limbs, and gleaming nails to look great. That kind of validation never comes in use.
Rather, polish up your smile and personality for a better, stress-less life.
You can’t know it all. LISTEN!
There are a million things in the universe you don’t know yet. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Use the power of silence, open your ears and your mind, and listen!
You gain life lessons, get guidance, enjoy interesting tales, and let the speaker feel happier.
It can be your fault at times, so owe up
You are a human. You have your limitations and faults. It is okay to make mistakes. That is how you learn.
But it is even more important to owe up as a responsible person and amend them.
Life is too short to keep waiting for the future
I once had a beautiful dress. Occasions came and went by, yet I kept it for some special day yet to come. When I finally wanted to wear it — guess what — I had outgrown it.
Don’t keep yourself warm in hope of a brighter future.
Love and consume your present as much as you can.
Kill your ego
The ego is what brought the end of powerful people around.
Ravana never considered the idea of his defeat. Hence, he lost to Lord Ram. Similarly, Hitler, overconfident in his military, also lost.
Stay humble.
In the end, all that matters is that you have inner peace and are happy
I chased the butterfly once. I ran, I pleaded, I fell, I continued, and I ate dirt. Tired, I settled down. For once, I was living in the present. Listening to the birds, the trees, the flow of water. My inner world was in harmony.
The butterfly came on my shoulder soon.
This insect is an analogy for happiness.
In the end, your PhD, income, and fame won’t matter as much as what your heart has to say will.
Interesting facts about soft drinks
Here’s a fun test:
Pour Coke into one glass and Pepsi into another. Invite one friend and make him or her drink both glasses without knowing the contents.
Ask the person the difference noticed if any.
Coke (1892) and Pepsi (1965) taste different because Coke was invented before refrigeration (1913).
Coke was designed to be drunk warm, while Pepsi was designed after refrigeration was invented so it was designed to be drunk cold.
As a result, the tastes are different.
But if you drink Pepsi cold and Coke warm they’ll taste the same!
Here’s a fact about the most lively drink of all — Fanta.
Enough With Making “Boundaries” With Others. What About Yourself?
You already know about the importance of creating boundaries with the people around you.
Here, you deem others’ behaviours acceptable and unacceptable.
No — you aren’t obliged to be available every second of your day, solve everybody’s problems, and act on all the favours asked by the others.
Relationships are the bedrock of human existence.
Knowing your boundaries and setting them leads to healthy relationships.
Have you ever considered having boundaries with yourself?
Book analysis: Learn From Christopher Paolini’s Major Writing Mistakes
I love foraying into fantasy worlds.
Christopher Paolini’s Eragon of The Inheritance Cycle is one such series I enjoyed reading. Paolini began it when he was 15 and published it when he was 19!
Hence, even though his achievement is laudable, he made some mistakes that made me DNF (did not finish) the series.
Here is a list of failures and accomplishments you can learn from.
His mistakes…
1) Purple and meaningless prose
Purple prose (as defined) is overly ornate prose text that may disrupt a narrative flow by drawing undesirable attention to its extravagant style of writing, thereby diminishing the appreciation of the prose overall.
Paolini set out to impress his audience with perplexing words no one could decipher.
Feels vexing and incongruous, right?